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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Random Thoughts - Parties - Cleaning - Moms - Family


Last Saturday our youngest son graduated from high school and we had a party, an outside party.  
Yet months ago I made a list of things to get done before the party:
Paint this, get rid of that.
Fix that, replace this.
Put that away, rebuild this.
CLEAN, CLEAN, CLEAN!!!!
EVERYTHING!!!
Be sure to get under the beds and 
don't just shut everything away in your closets!!

This party was outside!!! 
Some people came in to use the bathroom, which was very clean!!! with a new shower curtain!!
Some helped out in the kitchen, also very, very organized and clean.

I think I drive everyone nuts about this because my mother rarely visited and when she did she always made that "mother face", you know the one, I do the same face with my kids.  Anyone with children understands how hard it is to keep a house clean with four kids and at the time I was working full-time plus sometimes a part-time job too, and she would just drop in unexpectedly.  These days I can only supervise the cleaning and drive family crazy with my demands.

I remember my father-in-law always used to tease my mother-in-law that if she was on a cleaning frenzy 
her mother must be coming to visit.

That's how I was, I always wanted my mom's approval, never wanted her to know if the kids were misbehaving or see my house not up to her standards.  I needed her to know I was a good mom.

Sadly my mother passed away a couple of years ago, my father and father-in-law have been gone for several years.  I have the best mother-in-law on the planet, she never judges and always jumps right in to help. Funny, I don't get the same anxiety around her that I used to get from my own mom.

I know my mom and dads were looking down 
on us on Saturday and always, 
but I really missed them being here on Earth with us at the party. 
 Jayme was the last of this generation to graduate on my side and 
we just have one more on the Caswell side to graduate high school.

My dad died when Katy and Kris were toddlers and Betsy and Jayme never got to meet him, but I am amazed often when I see my dad in Jayme's actions and mannerisms. Betsy also has his compassion, the need to always help others.  This was a side my dad usually kept hidden but those who knew him well knew he had a heart as big as all outdoors.  Kris and Katy carry some his traits as well.  One Katy and I share is his stubbornness, yes we get that from him. 

My father-in-law at least got to meet all of his grandchildren but he was taken from us much too soon. Jayme has his love for tools and can fix almost anything.  His "Papa" would be very proud.

I know they would all be thrilled with all of their grandchildren's accomplishments and be there for them in their struggles as well.

While she was not here for the party Jeff's grandma, the one my mother-in-law always cleaned for, celebrated her 103rd birthday this week and while she gets some of the names mixed up of all her grandchildren, great grandchildren and great-great grandchildren I find so much joy in having her around to share these good times.  I wish we could visit her more often. In days long gone by the whole Caswell/Heuer family would gather at her house for one day each summer.  The cousins would all get to see each other, the food was plentiful and delicious, and a good time was always had by all.

Memories!
Family, that what life is all about. 
Not how clean your house is,
(but let's not get carried away here, cleanliness is still important.)
Yes Mom!! The house was clean!! 
 I am thrilled to be part of such a wonderful family!!

This random thought started out as my cleaning obsession of the past few weeks and the torture I put my husband and kids through but evolved into some wonderful memories and even a few tears, which was really a left turn as to what I had in mind.

Please feel free to share your thoughts, 
memories or add any comments to this post.  
Please tell me some of you get obsessive about cleaning for company just like I do!!
I love hearing from all of you.  


8 comments:

Tami said...

Sorry to hear about your hacking problems. Sounds awful. Personally, I didn't see a thing.

I think we all do the "excessive cleaning" thing because we want everyone to think our life is perfect and therefore our house is too. But I've rarely found someone who's house always looks that way. I've even caught my neat freak sister with an unmade bed and dishes in the sink. :)

Glad you enjoyed your day and your family.

Ms Bibi said...

I am sorry to hear about your blog being hacked....that is absolutely awful.

Wonderful post. It is always nice to remember the important things in life. I feel the same way about cleaning before any party, company or any chance of people coming by....

Beth(bookaholicmom) said...

Sorry to hear you were hacked. I didn't see anything. I hope too much dmamge wasn't done.

My mil would always say we are coming to see you not your house. I still would clean for weeks before she would visit. I guess it is part of our nesting instinct.

dollycas aka Lori said...

I am so glad you didn't see the pictures here, they were horrific. Thankfully author David Fingermann checked my blog when he received my email saying the vile emails were not from me and he alerted me immediately. Those pictures will be in my memory for a long time. I am actually afraid to post anything but need to get my head back in this and move on.

jackie b central texas said...

Lori sorry about the hacking mess, I did not receive any of the emails or see the blog before you cleaned it so thank goodness it did not traumatize my new eyes like it did yours!

I have to say of course I am OCD about cleaning prior to company or any other kind of drop by visits... However even without children of the two legged variety since my two cats are indoors and my little Chihuahua and the cats both shed all year around keeping things tidy is not something I keep up with as well as I should... The fact that we cannot spray insecticide for the house spiders that have moved in over the years is another problem but with my husband's asthma and my illness from any kind of chemicals it is a no win situation...

But is is nice to hear that of all the frantic worry your day went off with no major hitches, it is wonderful to know that the memories this one day made will be yours until memory is gone!

Take care Lori and I do miss your beach but glad you have things back on track!

Steve Capell said...

Sorry for the hack. I think there needs to be hefty fines for those that caught hacking into sites. I didn't see anything.

Carol M said...

I'm also sorry to hear that you were hacked. I didn't receive anything either.

I also clean when I know someone is coming over but not as much as I once did. lol

Dizzy C said...

Sorry about the probs.

I had a surprise party for my partner, D a couple of weeks ago. My house and garden have never been so clean and tidy. So glad I had that party! Though I did have that deflated feeling that all the hard work was for a couple of hours. :)

carol